Chapter 7: Don’t Touch Dead Things

**TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of self injury. If you or someone you know is struggling please contact: 988

Some wounds are invisible but that doesn’t mean they don’t hurt.
**

MIKA:
The engine groans like it’s deciding whether to keep running or die on us. I sit beside Jasper, watching him twist his headphones again, like repetition will fix them when he already knows it won’t. Nobody talks. Even Mavis is quiet in the back.
I stare out the window, trying not to think too hard about last night. About what it meant. About why we did it anyway.
The bus jolts over a cracked stretch of road, rainwater bleeding across wet asphalt. We pass an old building half-swallowed by scaffolding and rusted signage. I don’t need to think to recognize it. The place from last night.
For a second, I catch the sign— “OLD NEW YORK CITY HALL – MUNICIPAL RECORDS ARCHIVE.”
It just doesn’t make much sense.
Maybe the police just gave up on completely solving it.
Jasper keeps fidgeting with his headphones. Mavis doesn’t move at all. But something lingers in my chest anyway. Like I was meant to see that, or like I should’ve known this already. Why would he send us to an old city hall?
I almost say it out loud. Instead, I stay quiet, because I don’t have proof. And if I’m wrong, I’ll just sound paranoid. And no one needs that right now.
But even as I stay silent, the feeling doesn’t go away.
The bus lurches, then slows. A stop sign flashes past the window.
We’re here.
I hesitate for half a second longer than I should. Then, I tap Jasper’s shoulder. He doesn’t look at me—just stands, already moving down the aisle toward the door. Mavis keeps humming to fill the silence.
I step off the bus carefully. Mavis jumps down after me and almost stumbles into a puddle, catching herself with a sharp laugh.
Jasper is already walking ahead of us, down the street toward Crimson, without looking back. I scan the sidewalk. Axel isn’t immediately there. My stomach tightens.
“Axel, you’re gonna get hit by a car,” Mavis calls from behind me.
Then I see him. He’s on the curb, completely still, leaning over a puddle like it’s something important.
I move closer. There’s a pigeon in it. One wing is torn wrong—angled like it shouldn’t be there at all.
“It’s still alive,” Axel says when he notices me, eyes lifted like he’s waiting for confirmation instead of instruction.
Mavis lets out a short laugh behind me. “That thing’s gonna give you at least several diseases.” Axel doesn’t look away from it. Neither do I, for a second.
“Guys, let’s move,” Jasper calls from near the stop sign a few feet away. Mavis sighs and walks over before Axel can react. “Come on.”
She hooks an arm around him and drags him along, trying to keep him from eyeing the pigeon as he resists leaving.
“Don’t touch dead things,” she mutters, half-joking as she steers him forward. “I didn’t touch it,” Axel says quietly. I linger behind them, already thinking about how to phrase everything to Creed.
A few minutes later, we’re back in the same alleyway that leads back to the abandoned subway. Same rats, same trash and smoke. And same tension. Jasper’s already opening the door without thinking, acting like he’s not scared. “Jasper, stop, we have to—”
I’m cut off by Creed as he pushes the door open after Jasper cracks it. “Finally. You know I’ve been waiting.” He chuckles. Jasper fidgets with the end of his headphones resting on his shoulders. I straighten my posture so I look confident.
“We got inside, but something triggered security. We didn’t have enough time to search the headquarters before we got caught.” I interrupt the silence like nails on a chalkboard. Creed gives no reaction. He just turns back into the doorway, expecting us to follow. And we do just that.
The old light overhead in the staircase flickers. At the end, Creed pushes open the heavy door leading to the hallway that stretches out long, with the old subway tracks on the left.
I grab the fabric at the end of my shirt, twisting it between my fingers, and look at Creed to get his attention.
“If we didn’t get caught, we would’ve had it,” I say. “We know it’s there now. We can try again.” My voice comes out sharper than I mean it to—almost desperate. And the second it leaves my mouth, I regret it. Mavis kicks the back of my foot, hard enough to sting, a silent warning to shut up.
He turns; his icy blue eyes lock onto me.
Then, they turn to Axel.
“Axel,” he says. “Come with me a moment?” Axel looks almost relieved, but also uncertain. He hesitates a moment, then follows Creed to the back. Then I step forward. “We’ll get the records. We will—” Mavis grabs my shoulder, turns me around, and looks at me with wide, pale green eyes. Jasper puts his face into the palm of his hand and groans.
Creed stares at me a moment. “Good, I know.” His words twist in an inhuman way. “Bring me all the evidence.” He takes Axel by the shoulder and guides him through the back door into his office—the space he keeps sealed off most of the day.
The door closes behind them.
My jaw clenches.
Mavis immediately turns to me, snapping her head around. “What the hell was that?” she barks angrily in my face. “Learn to control yourself,” Jasper mumbles, heading down the hall. For some reason, that felt different coming from him. I lower my head, mad at myself for acting like that. I hear Creed’s muffled talking from inside the office. He sounds oddly calm, weirdly friendly.
Mavis looks up at the ceiling with her hand on her head. “Mika, you just gave us more work,” she says, irritated. “Maybe last night wasn’t enough,” Jasper spits out impulsively. I laugh under my breath, forcing the surprise down. “It wasn’t enough because we didn’t complete it.” I keep my eyes on the ground, not wanting to look at them.
Jasper stops walking and looks at me like I wasn’t supposed to hear that. “So it’s not about us. It’s about whether we get it done, huh?” Mavis shifts her weight, watching closely. “You’re twisting my words.” I sound calm. Too calm. And he notices.
“It’s obviously what you mean,” he snaps back, looking at me now. I snap my gaze to his. “You’re getting upset over nothing, and you don’t even know that.” I sound too rigid when I answer.
“I’m not upset.” He tries matching my calm tone. I don’t respond; it won’t escalate if I don’t. He turns away and walks down the hall again.
Mavis is quiet next to me. I don’t say anything, or even look at her. I just walk in the opposite direction.
Obviously, how hard I try doesn’t pay off, I guess.

JASPER:
I walk down the hall slowly; When they can’t see, I open the bathroom door and hit the light switch. It’s messy, and the mirror’s dirty. I lean against the wall and close my eyes. I try my hardest to focus on something else but whenever I do
last night, Mika, heists—everything.

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block it out when I know very well it won’t work. Why does this always happen? Why can’t I just have a normal life like everyone else? I hold my breath and exhale slowly. It doesn’t work. I try again.
It doesn’t work. Why was I so mean to him? Why did I say that?

With that thought, I just need to feel something else.

Even if it’s just for a bit.

I don’t know what else to even do at this point. I hesitate for just a moment. But nothing else feels like it matters or could help right now.
I look through the drawers for anything that catches my eye. Anything to keep me from spiraling further.
It’s metal, with a pinkish glow to it. I clench my jaw tightly enough it hurts. I look down and press it to my flesh. I exhale sharply through my mouth, then I realize my breathing’s uneven. And then I’m done. I place it on the sink, and there’s no going back. I stare at it a moment and press my lips together hard enough they’re pale. I grab a black towel from the shelf next to me and place it on my arm.
I sit on the edge of the bath and stare at it.

Why am I like this?

“Jasper, Creed wants us in the hall!” Mavis shouts from behind the door. I flinch immediately and pick it off the sink, then shove it back into the drawer. “What are you doing?” Mavis says, confused, still outside. I don’t respond and slam the drawer shut too loud.
“Jasper, what are you—” “God! Please—just fuck off, Mavis!” I hear her step back from the door. She doesn’t respond, like she’s surprised and irritated. I hear her footsteps walk away from the door.
When I hear her walk away completely, I drop onto the hard bathroom floor, tucking my head into my knees.
Suck it up. Just suck it up. You’re fine.
My eyes start to burn, and I immediately look up to stop them from spilling.
I don’t deserve them.
A tear trickles down my face and onto the towel.
I’m so dramatic.
Why am I so dramatic?
A steady sob breaks loose from my throat. I take my other arm and wipe my face on my sleeve. But that just smears instead. My nose runs over my lips, but I keep trying my hardest to hold it back. I exhale shakily.
I’m a coward.
I inhale and release quietly. I do it again, and it turns into another sob, then a jagged breath. I pull my head down, annoyed, and stay like that for a moment. I try to breathe through my nose, but it’s too stuffy.
Then I hear someone knock.
“Jasper, you good?” Mika’s voice. “Yeah,” I call back. It cracks, and I freeze. “I’m fine, Mika.”
There’s a silence, then—not the quick silence of a passing conversation, but a heavy, dragging beat. I can hear the shift of his weight on the floorboards outside, the way he leans toward the wood as if he’s going to push it open. My heart hammers against my ribs, terrified he will.
Then, a soft exhale.
"Right," he says. His voice is flat, almost clinical. "Don't take all day. We’re waiting outside still."
The sound of his footsteps retreating down the hall is the most hollow sound I’ve ever heard. He’s gone, and the silence in the room rushes back in to fill the space where he was standing.
More tears spill down my face, and I still don’t know why; I don’t bother to wipe them this time, I sit there for a minute. Staring at the beige door. I need to leave before they get suspicious. I run cold water over my face over and over. My eyes are still red, so I pull my hoodie over my head, walking into the hall.